Tikkabik

Almost six years ago we moved from our old neighborhood to a new one on the other side of town. It was a great move. I like our new house and our new neighborhood much better, not because they're intrinsically better but simply because they're better suited for the family.

Anyway, we tried to stay in touch with our old neighbors, because we had developed friendships with them and they meant something to us. One family, in particular, were very good friends to us, and we, I thought, to them, even though superficially we were opposites in certain respects -- Bonnie and I on the liberal/libertarian end of the spectrum, they on the conservative Republican end. But we both had kids, common interests and a real focus on what was important: Family and quality of life.

The husband worked for a large company in a rather transient engineering position that kept him from home for months at a stretch, which caused his wife a lot of stress when raising their two children. What's more, the wife was saddled with the occasional responsibility of caring for a seriously disabled sibling. When the family had an opportunity to settle more permanently, they jumped at the chance, and I certainly don't blame them.

It required the family to relocate half way across the United States, however. Shortly after they moved, they fell out of touch, more or less after they settled in their new digs and started to acclimate to their new surroundings. Outside of a perfunctory e-mail to let us know they were safe, they've been out of touch completely. And have stopped responding to e-mail or other communication entirely.

Their house has been sold and (thankfully) repainted, and all the traces of their lives here have vanished. What's more, I recently learned that they've given a business associate who still works with them in this area strict orders not to provide anyone who comes looking with any forwarding information about them -- no address, phone number or e-mail address. And I can't help but wonder why.

I'm certain it has nothing to do with us, personally -- we were on good terms with them. And I know they'd had some antagonistic relationships with others in the old neighborhood, but nothing that might merit such a complete divorce from this area.

Theories have circulated, of course. One theory posits that they've left a debt or some other serious commitment behind, and don't want to be troubled by it. I don't really know what to think.

I'm just a little sad to know that in retrospect, our relationship with them meant more to us than their relationship with us. I wish they'd been honest and said, "You know what? When we move, we're going to fall out of touch. We want to start a new life in our new home and don't want any strings attaching us to our old life."

Even at the risk of hurting our feelings and others', that at least would have been honest. I really detest dishonesty, and if I'd realized that was their character to begin with, I doubt I would have had much to do with them in the first place.