Anthropomorphism
By now you may have seen the YouTube Kitty Washing Machine video, in which some poor cat is bathed by a "pet spa" and spends his entire time clawing wildly at a plexiglas panel and jumping around trying to escape the geysers of water that spurt up from the floor. It's entertaining, if a bit sadistic. Aw hell. If you like cats, it's pure entertainment, because you know that they're just fine after a bath, even if they freak out when the water touches them.
Well, yesterday Max has a loose stomach. And he's really, really furry. And he's tubby. So he's not that adept at cleaning himself. So he stank. I'd decided I'd had enough this morning, so I took him in the shower with me to hose down his hindquarters.
That Pet Spa in the video? That was me.
The wounds just stopped bleeding a little while ago.