Transubstantiation
I was just talking to Jim and was reminded of this story about Robert that I thought I'd share with you all.
About six or seven years ago, Bonnie decided to take young Robert -- then three or four years old -- to a Catholic mass. It was a novel experience for him, although its attraction has worn off in recent years thanks to his weekly attendance at CCD (Catholic Sunday school).
Anyway, they made it through the mass, and then the priest began to distribute the Eucharist to the faithful. Robert hears the words "body of Christ" repeated. This piques his curiosity.
Bonnie gets up to leave -- she's not going to take communion today. "Let's go, honey," she says to Bob.
"I want to see the body," said Robert, matter of factly.
"No, honey, it's time to go."
"I want to see the body," Bob repeats. He's convinced that some bizarre cannibalistic ritual is taking place up on the dais, where they're tearing off chunks of a dead body and feeding it to people. Which, in a sense, is exactly what's happening.
"Really, Bob. We have to go."
"I want to see the body!" shrieks Robert as Bonnie literally drags him out of the church, creating a scene that draws the attention of everyone in the church.
Hey, I've heard even the most erudite religious scholars start to fumble when they try to explain transubstantiation, so I can't exactly expect my kids to get it, either.
Though I have to admit, Robert's had a peculiar fascination with zombies ever since then.